evil monkey



The Old Hand :

George, a neighbor down the road, had himself a monkey. Or maybe it was the other way around. This monkey was just too mean and ornery to ever be called a pet. It tolerated George. It disliked all other creatures that walked on two legs. And it positively hated all four legged animals, especially dogs.

In nice weather, George would stake the monkey outside on a twenty foot chain. It wore out the grass in a circle around the stake; except not a twenty foot radius, only fifteen feet. That extra five feet of chain was the monkey’s gotcha for dogs.

A unsuspecting dog would come to just outside the worn grass and bark and  tease the monkey, thinking it was safe, not realizing the chain was five feet longer than the monkey’s circle. The monkey would run at the dog, and much to the dog’s surprise, would not stop at the edge of the grass. Instead it used up the extra chain to leap on the dog’s back, bite, scratch, draw blood, until the poor dog could manage to escape the foul-smelling demon.

One Easter Sunday, George returned from Mass to the sight of the fire department wetting down the ashes of his trailer home and the monkey. He stood by his truck and lit a cigarette with a match. He had misplaced his Zippo lighter earlier in the day. One of the firemen said a Zippo was found by the monkey’s open-doored cage.

George bought himself a replacement Zippo, but never bothered to buy himself a replacement monkey.

Published St. Paul Pioneer Press, Bulletin Board       3/20/15






2 thoughts on “GEORGE HAD A MONKEY

  1. Yes it is spooky and sad. I think it is a result of the monkey playing with the lighter and probably setting his fur on fire. I told the story because of stories in the BULLETIN BOARD of people and their pet monkeys. Cats, dogs, horses are pets for people. this idea of having exotic pets is not good in my estimation. Seldom do they really ever become pets. But on the other hand, maybe the old monkey was just fed up with cages and chains and did commit suicide.

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